This week I had a few black-dog days. Days where the world felt really heavy and hard. Maybe you’ve had one of these days before and are familiar with the feelings?
Over the years I’ve done quite a bit of work on my mindset and mastering my emotions with coaches and professionals. I am not perfect, but I’ve definitely come leaps and bounds from where I’ve been in the past.
Occasionally, one of these dark days, or a few of them back-to-back, take hold of me and all of my go-to tools don’t seem to work. When that happens, I’ve got a husband who both physically holds me but also holds space for me. It’s a fine line to walk between feeling the feels but not letting myself fall into a black hole of desperation. In those moments we are a couple and a team but he is playing lead.
The thing is, when I am in this state, I am not very useful to anyone, hardly even myself. I can’t focus on the wellbeing of the people or world around me. It’s insular.
I believe the same is true for the state of our relationships. When that part of our life is in pain, it’s very hard to show up as our best self in the workplace, for friends, for opportunities or for the world. So much time, money and energy is sucked out of us when our relationships aren’t in a good place, or when they are ending in tumultuous ways.
In this week's episode of Date Forever, our guest Nicola from Classroom of Hope reminded me of the Mother Teresa quote “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family”
I’ve got big ideas, plans and visions for what I want out of this life and I know that I want to be part of creating a better world. Things that won’t be possible if my own state or the state of my relationship isn’t happy, healthy & thriving.
So this week I am focusing on loving at home, taking care of myself and taking care of my relationship so that I can be the change I want to see in the world.
And I have a hunch that the planet needs you too.
PS - If you know you are here on this planet to do something big, you just aren’t yet sure what. This weeks podcast episode - Pursuing shared purpose with passion to create a Better World with Duncan Ward and Nicola Courtin might provide some guidance on uncovering it.